OVERWHELMED by all the NOISE!!

Typically I would be at the office right now working on music, videos and logos, but today is different. Is it different because it's the 11th anniversary of 9/11? No. Is it different because I am writing a blog? That might be part of it. It's different because I am writing a blog here at Starbucks drinking a vinti Pumpkin Spice Latte and taking a break from job searching. Ya see, a few weeks ago, August 30th to be exact, I was asked to resign. I was caught by surprise and asked to have my office cleared out by the end of the day. I think I am just now realizing that I do not have a job! Now I am not going to go into why I was let go (because I harbor no ill-will toward the church and their decision), that is not who I am. The reason for this post is really to talk about the emotional whiplash I am currently experiencing.

A few days after being asked to resign, I went with my wife and the family she nanny's for to Destin, Florida. I told myself it would be a great way to rest, relax, and figure out my next steps. Well, it was relaxing and I did get some rest, but was still in a way in denial about not working at the church. I still couldn't believe that it happened. While at the beach to took lots of pictures of the kids and family and edited them (because I love doing that stuff!) But now that I am back in reality, I have to face the harsh truth that for the first time, I am unemployed.

I have been flooding the job market with my resume, but because I have a history degree, most places aren't really attracted to me. It seems like an uphill battle that I am not prepared for. This past Sunday my wife and I went to church. This is huge because for the past 3 years, I have worked at church and therefore church was a job, not a worship experience. Pastor Buddy started a series called Overwhelmed. This particular Sunday was the first message in the series and it was entitled "Noise."

The first scripture he gave was one I have always known, but that day, meant more than ever.

"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."
Psalm 46:10 (NIV)

I needed to be reminded of that, not that God is God, but to be still. My emotions are going crazy, my brain is going crazy because I want to provide for my wife. I needed to be reminded to be still. 

"God don't make junk! He just doesn't!" His grammar left a lot to be desired, but maybe that was the point. When Buddy said that, it stuck. Then he followed with this:

"I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well!" 
Psalm 139:14 (NIV)

When I am still and know that God is who He says He is, I praise Him for what He has done! He created me, he knit me in my mothers womb (Psalm 139:13) and He knows the number of hairs on my head! In that I find my personal confidence. I am created by God. 

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."

Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)

I am God's workmanship. God don't make no junk, so what am I created to do? It may confuse some that I worked at a church, the house of God, and was asked to leave. However, I do not live to please man, but my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I am created to do good works out of the overflowing love of the Father. If I am not able to do it IN the church, than I will BE the church in all aspects of my life, sharing the love God has bestowed upon me with others. This is my life's purpose, and I need to focus on that, and not all the other crap life throws at me. 

Once I can accept that and do it, I can find rest in the timing of God. 

"He has made everything beautiful in it's time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end."
Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NIV)

He has made everything beautiful IN IT'S TIME. That's easy to say, but it's hard to live out! We live in a society that is self gratifying and instant. We want it now! When one door closes (let go from a job, a relationship ends, etc.) we want and expect another to already have been opened. But that's not how it works and I am currently learning that. 

"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."
Proverbs 19:21 (NIV)

I reckon this is the best place to but that timeless phrase: Let go and let God. My wife and I have a verse that we have clung to since early on when we were dating. 

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."Psalm 37:4 (NIV)

When I find all my happiness and joy in Christ, in turn, He will grant me my heart's desire. But here is why - when my happiness and joy are found solely in Christ, than all my heart desires are the things of God! This is what Tascha and I strive for each and every day: that as our love for God grows, so will our love for one another. We are united in our mission to love God and love others and it is because of our joint heart's desire that God renews our love for one another and blesses our marriage. So even though I may not have a job, I have a wife who supports me, loves me, and would do anything for me. That is God taking care of the ones He loves. 

"For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and invisible, rank after rank after rank or angels - everything got started in Him and finds its purpose in Him"
Colossians 1:16 (MSG)

There are people in this world who can multitask like nobody's business! My wife is one of these people. She can be cleaning the house, cooking, and talking on the phone all while holding two kids in her arms and dealing with them! Oh my dude!!! I do good if I can walk and chew gum at the same time. All of us have strengths. A lot of the time we thinks we need to concentrate on our weaknesses and strengthen them so we can become even stronger. That's all well and good, but in the long run, it doesn't help us a whole lot. When we do that, we become mediocre at a lot of things, but excellent at nothing. Our God demands that best and we should want to offer our best! With that said, I need to magnify my strengths and get in S.H.A.P.E.

Spiritual Gifts

Heart  

Abilities

Personality

Experiences

We have all been given spiritual gifts and we need to strengthen them in order to magnify God to the best of our ability. We need to make sure our heart it totally surrendered to the cause of Christ. Our abilities (talents) should be enhanced and grown to better serve the Lord. God has given us a personality and we should use that as a tool to share His love. We have all gone through certain experiences and although me may not know why, we should remember them in order to connect and minister to others down the road. 

"Be very careful, then, how you live - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. therefore do now be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is."
Ephesians 5:15-17 (NIV)

When I am in shape, and even in the process of getting into shape, opportunities will come my way and I had better jump on them! Just a few hours ago, I was walking down the sidewalk in front of a few other stores to get to Starbucks. A lady was walking perpendicular to me holding a box. We arrived in front of the Parcels 2 Go door at the same time. What did I do? Did I open the door for her? NO!!! I was so concentrated about getting into Starbucks and finding a seat with a table next to a plug, that I totally neglected that woman and my call! I threw away a wonderful opportunity to share the love of God because I was selfish. So many times when we are in the valleys, we become selfish and all "woe is me!" Ironically, those are the times we should humble ourselves and allow the Lord to lift us up! (James 4:10) 

So God, I pray that the noise of this world, that all the anxiety, worry and stress, would be drown out and I would be quiet, still and acknowledge your presence. God direct me in the way of Your will, give me strength to persevere and may I find rest in You and You alone. Thank you for a wonderful wife and how she shines Your love so brightly in my life! Thank you for what You are doing in me, through me and in spite of me. May everything I do honor and glorify You!