Rein In Us!

So, I play guitar and I express how I feel through playin my guitar. It is also one of the ways I talk with God and how He talks to me. The chorus and bridge by Starfield expresses how I feel.

C G
Oh Great and Mighty One, with one desire we come
Dm C F G
That You would reign, that You would reign in us
C G
We're offering up our lives, a living sacrifice
Dm C F G
That You would reign, that You would reign in us


G F C G
We cry out for Your life to revive us, cry out
F C G
For Your love to defy us, cry out
F C Am Gsus G
For Your mercy to keep us blameless until You return


F C G
So, reign please reign in us
F C G
Come purify our hearts, we need Your touch
F C G
Come cleanse us like a flood and send us out
F C G
So the world may know You reign you reign in us


So this is what has been going on in my heart. My life the past few years has been characterized by deceit, dishonesty and sexual immorality. I would lie to people about things I knew they wouldn't wanna hear. I struggled with pornography and answering personals on craigslist and talking to people I didn't know so I wouldn't feel alone and/or to satisfy physical wants and desires. My relationships were not holy, they ware very physical and in some I was sexually active. The pursuit of Christ was always a goal, however, it never was made a priority. Sin had consumed me like Venom to Spider Man. Instead of being consumed by the Spirit, I was consumed by sin and sin is the separation from God.

The thing is, during those years, I was working for a campus ministry and a church. I am amazed at how two-faced I was, that I was one person when doing church stuff, but when I was alone, or with my girlfriend, I was another person. Not only did I bring myself down, but I brought down those who I dated. I tried a few times to turn from my sin and return to God. However, this would not last and I would fall right back into my old habits.

In October 2009, I heard a quote from one of the wisest men I know. "I feel that most of us are far more educated than our level of obedience." This was said based off of James 1:22-25.

22Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does.

I have looked into the mirror of my soul for so long and never done anything.I've always known I need to do something and even how to do it, but my lethargic self has been less that willing to cooperate with the Spirit burning within me. Well...now I am doing something. I am sick and tired of surrendering my life to other gods and idols. Christ is my one true love and it's about time I start showing that and living it! My life verse is Isaiah 26:8 which states (as interpreted by me)

"Lord, as we walk in Your ways, we eagerly wait for You! For it is Your name and Your RENOWN that are the desire of our souls!"

The other day, I was walking from my dorm to the student center which is about a five minute walk. The entire way over there, I heard footsteps behind me. I never looked behind me because I was afraid to. Why was I? was I scared of what I would see? Maybe the person behind me would give me an odd look? In my heart, I could hear God telling me that He has been chasing after me for quite some time and I have been afraid to look behind me, scared of what He might reveal to me. A few days later, I traveled to Knoxville for a sports card show. I was supposed to be in Kingsport at a discipleship now weekend, but I was called and told I was no longer needed (but still getting paid). On the way there, I had a great worship session in my truck. I had another awesome worship session on the way back. When I got back to my dorm, I changed and went to the mountains to spend alone time with my Father. I didn't say one word while I was there. I just stood, sat, walked and ran in the midst of His splendor. It was there that I really learned how to worship and live a life pleasing to my Savior.

So God, this is my prayer:

"Take my life, I lay it down
At the cross where I am found
All I have I give to You, oh God

Take my hands and make them clean
Keep my heart in purity
That I may walk in all You have for me

Oh, here I stand arms open wide
Oh, I am Yours and You are mine Jesus

Take my moments and my days
Let each breath that I take
Be ever only for You, oh God

My whole life is Yours, I give it all
Surrendered to Your name
And forever I will pray
Have Your way, have Your way"


*Lyrics from Reign In Us by Starfield and Arms Open Wide by Hillsong

Melting Snow

Right now I am sitting on my bed. When I look outside my window I see the mountains in the distance and the leafless, stripped trees swaying in the wind. I also see the ground, that no less than 24 hours earlier was covered with an eye piercing white blanket of snow, like a blanket covering all that is dead and barren underneath. Now, most of the snow is gone and the real ground covering is revealed. The dead grass, mud, twigs and rocks that give the ground its texture and form are seen and the ground is shown for what it really is.

However, for me, I see a lot more than that. Maybe it’s just the way God reveals Himself to me. When I look at the mountains, I see the mighty power of God, His strength and power. I am the trees, swaying in the wind, bending beneath the weight of His mercy. When we surrender ourselves to God, he strips us down to the bare wood. Because we are His children (if we have accepted Christ as our Savior), He has covered us in a blanket of white, so in His eyes, we are pure. Our afflictions have been eclipsed by His glory! Ya know how you are not supposed to look at an eclips or at the sun, because it will blind you? Well, in a way, Gods snowy white blanket of mercy (Jesus Christ) blinds Him and He cant see our iniquities. Yes, He knows they are there and He will help us through them, but when He sees us, He sees pure sons and daughters. Is that not exciting?!

Now, because God loves us, He wants us to be the best we can be. So although His mercy will never go away, He does tend to show us for who we are, just like when the snow melts, it reveals the ground for what it is. When God shows us for what we really are, it gives us the chance to become more like Him (although we will never achieve such a feat, for even though we are called to be perfect as Christ is perfect, we are not. However, the strive for perfection and a Godward life that is what that commandment is really getting at)!

God showing us for who we are is one of the many ways He loves us. Yes, it’s sad when the snow melts away and there are no more snowmen or snowball fights and we all have to go back to school, but spiritually, it’s a good thing. Whenever it snows now, I am reminded of the abounding grace God has for me and whenever it melts away, I take the time to pray to God and ask Him to show me who I really am so that I might be more like Him in all ways of my life. God, I pray that as the snow melts away and reveals the earth for what it truly is, may you show me who I really am, that I may run into your loving arms of perfection and allow you to shape and mold my life and become the man you would have me to be.

Simple

I wrote this a while back, but i thought id share it anyway :)


Follow - there is no better way to describe this journey
One foot in front of the other, looking forward
My eyes on You and You alone
For when I fixate my eyes on You, the Glorious Redeemer
And see You face to face
What else can I do but worship?
I humble myself before you, oh God
Strip me of my human desire
Rid me of all my impurities and iniquities
I bow at Your feet, my King
I Believe
Trust and faith I put in You, my Father
Let my heart be Your home, Your dwelling place
Now that I am pure in Your sight
White as the newly fallen snow
Not worthy to be called Your son
But mercy and grace define You
You are love
It is because of Your yearn for relationship
That I may begin to know You
And through knowing You, I can Obey
Obedience is almost a taboo word
It has a connotation of demand, but is it?
Are You demanding me to trust You, to love, to follow and believe?
Or perhaps is it just a simple request?
Yes, I believe it to be
Obedience and servitude are my direct responses
To Your love and kindness, grace and mercy
I follow because You ask
I believe for You are Truth
I obey out of belief
I follow out of obedience
It's a circle, purified and made perfect
By the only one capable of making such
A pure and holy trinity
All things depend on the other
Father, Son, Holy Spirit
Follow, Believe, Obey
My God, how simple Your message
So simple, that a mere sinner understands
That without You, I am simply….nothing.

The Butterfly

You know, a butterfly is an amazing creature. Created by a glorious Father who loves it, cares for it and feeds it. This magnificent creature starts off as something so small, so insignificant, but the plan of the Father has for it is most amazing. This tiny creature works as hard as it can to not die by another animal or by the foot of someone walkin through the woods. It lives not by its own agenda, but of an internal agenda put in its heart by its creator. It lives to praise God. It was created to praise God. The God of the universe, the very being that came down to earth to be in relation with us and die for us, is who this lil caterpillar is made for. If it makes it to the cocoon stage, it is shaped and molded into what Gods ultimate plan for it is. God always has a bigger plan for us. His love for us is big, its loud, its strong and its true. Once the caterpiller breaks free from its cocoon, it’s no longer a caterpillar, but a breathtaking butterfly who screams the praise of God with every flap of its wings! Unfortunately for the butterfly, its life span is not very long. Maybe a few weeks at best. However, for those few weeks, it lets nothing get in between it and its creator.
In the grand scheme of things, how are we any different than the butterfly? Aside the deep theological answers of free will and what not, how are we different? Honestly, were not different. We are born as ugly beings of little significance and we go through life trying not to die. There is a point in our lives in which God transforms us (salvation) and we are new beings, worshiping Him with every action and word (or at least trying to do so). We live for a short while and then we die. So, why is this important?
Its important because no matter what happens in our lives, God is always there. He will never leave us. “When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me. Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.” Well I am not Catholic, so I replace Mary with Christ, but these lyrics are true. God did not implant His will for us in our hearts. He gave us His word. He gave us a choice. I chose Him and through His word, through His creation he speaks to me. He comforts me in times of sadness. He clothes me when I am naked, feeds me when I am hungry, heals me when I am sick. He wipes away the tear currently running down my cheek, loves me for who I am and am becoming through Him, not for who I was or what I did. My God is a gracious God! My God is the everlasting God! My God makes me speechless, yet He fills my lungs with breath every second of the day. The Provider lives!

Just a Thought

Exodus 3:15
…the LORD, the God of your fathers – the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob…This is my name forever, the name by which I am to be remembered from generation to generation

- LORD as defined by Marriam-Webster, is one having power and authority over others; a ruler by preeminence to who service and obedience are due.
o A ruler by preeminence means a ruler having paramount rank or being supreme. Basically, this is saying that LORD = SUPREMACY

Hosea 12:5
The Lord God Almighty, the Lord is His name of Renown

- RENOWN as defined by Marriam-Webster, is a state of being widely acclaimed and highly honored
o LORD = RENOWN


So, if the Lord is supreme and His name, LORD is how He, God, is widely acclaimed and highly honored, and if He is to be remembered from generation to generation, then why is He forgotten? Why is He neglected? Why is He disobeyed? If the Lord God Almighty is the desire of our hearts, they why do I put my faith in things of this world? If Jesus Christ is what I live for, then why do I not meditate on His Word?
If we are really honest with ourselves, we don’t treat God like Lord, but like a friend who is always there when we want them to be. The thing about God is that He is always there. He is there when we are happy, but also when we are sad. He is there when we don’t want Him there. He shows us things we don’t want to see, things we don’t want to hear, things we don’t want to admit. Maybe that’s why it’s so easy to proclaim Him to others, but we won’t let Him proclaim Himself to us.